It is well known that the "college experience" often includes difficult debts. However, this is not necessary. By using distance learning methods, CLEP tests, and more. The modern student can save time and money in college. I blog about how to get a degree debt-free. You can visit my blog at http://debtfreecollege.blogspot.com/.
Thanks, Nate
Joe C.
· 9 months ago
if only i could go back to my college years (even though they ended less than one year ago), i would totally man up a little bit more. i wasn't a partier or a gamer, or anything like that, i just didn't give class all i had. and i wish i did.
if you're still in college, i'll tell you right now: it's not fun to say that. don't make the same mistake.
Liam
· 9 months ago
I wish I had this sort of wisdom when I first started at university. I totally blew my chance at King's College London, and I look back on it with absolute dismay now- a chance to spend three years in a great city studying history, which is a passion of mine, with some of the greatest academics in the field, and I totally wasted it. I second what Joe C. says, if you have this all before you then seize every opportunity.
I was lucky and got a second chance, but not at such a good uni, nor on a course I loved. But having travelled America, grown up a bit, and yes even read a biography of Theodore Roosevelt (funny how young men seeking to self improve are drawn to him, I was pleased to see how much emphasis is placed on his example on this website!) I have fully engaged with my new course, joined sports teams, run societies and really focussed on the future, and it has made all the difference. I just wish I had done that the first time around!
I am now weeks aways from graduating, and am hoping to be ordained into the Church of England, which will mean yet another three years of study! By the time I leave higher education I should have it down to fine art!
Patrick
· 9 months ago
The Well Educated Mind. Not manly in focus, but definitely focuses on training your mind and best done at the time when you are steeped in educational pursuits.
Mikey
· 9 months ago
I would like to fit into one of the categories (or maybe a new category) of the Arts & Literature. University is one of the few places in your life where you will have immediate and free (or affordable) access to performances of music, drama, and dance, not to mention overflowing library shelves of literature and critique. Plus, the wall acreage of the visual arts as well..
To mention, actually being involved in the arts can give the mind and spirit the same workout as that of an athlete (not as physical, but you get the point.) Once you leave the campus life for the real life, all of those things become pricey but also not always as accessible. Only libraries in major urban areas can rival those of a campus, and ticket prices for performances are quite pricey in the real world.
So in conclusion, don't forget the Arts & Literature are also a fine (and recommended) way to keep a balanced, positive focus while in higher education!
Patrick
· 9 months ago
ummm completely off topic Brad, but did you happen to see the Modest Mouse show last weekend at Balch Fieldhouse? It was awesome!
I graduated from University of Col BOulder about 2 years ago...great school
Scott
· 9 months ago
College was definitely a time of self-realization and development. I went in as a cocky 18-year-old and realized rather quickly I didn't really know much of anything. It was a great time to develop discipline and learn from people who think differently then yourself.
Jim
· 9 months ago
Nice peice. Fellow AOM fans, please checkout my college - Williamson Free School of Mechanical Trades. We teach the basic trades and focus on character development to take our students from boys to solid, well rounded men.
All these student are deserving young men who ALL get a full scholarship (tuition, room and board) to go here.
The other tailback that ran with Byron "Whizzer" White was William "Kayo" Lam. He was running back for CU from '32-'34 and ran along side White. Most people know White because of his later professional accomplishments, but it was Kayo that had the schools rushing record for several years (2,225 yards in 10 games!). Kayo was also only 5'9 and 155 pounds. His freshman year, the coach told him he was too small to play. He went on to be an all-American and played in the East-West Shrine (the College all-star game of that day). At CU, he was also the Rocky Mountain wrestling champion, and conducted his own band. While in college, he fought in a fraternity boxing match that was rigged. He was set up against a pro. He knocked the pro out. He went on to fight in WWII and eventually became Athletic Director at CU, and was inducted in to CU's and the state of Colorado's Hall of Fame. He was truly a manly man. He also happened to be my grandfather. You can google "Kayo Lam" for more info.
Paul Hakel
· 9 months ago
I think that the accomplishments listed in the first paragraph really aren't that great. What about spiritual well-being, the love you share towards others, the relationships you create and personal obstacles you overcome? I think our American culture is missing those as being the Real challenges, the Real accomplishments. They are greater accomplishments because they often go unacknowledged. We reward all the wrong behaviours. I skateboard, for example; am I going to get a varsity letter for that? Awards such as trophies, paper, or ceremonies - those are artificial. Real awards are known by each person as they do them and aren't to be flaunted: climbing a mountain, taking a risk, taking ethical action. Let's keep an open focus on what is a Real accomplishment and not neglect the accomplishments that society doesn't focus on.
Jeff
· 9 months ago
Paul-
Trophies, papers, and ceremonies are hardly artificial. They are tangible manifestations of the kind of things you personally wish to see celebrated-risk, personal relationships, overcoming obstacles, making ethical decisions, ect. One does not get to be student body president if he hasn't cultivated warm relationships with others. You don't get to be a Rhodes scholar if you haven't overcome obstacles and disciplined yourself. You don't become a Supreme Court justice by avoiding ethical decisions. A list like the one above is simply shorthand for a lifetime of worthy decisions. These are real achievements, not because of the certificate at the end, but because of all the work it took to get there.
Why would you get a trophy for just skateboarding? Skateboarding itself says very little about your character. Any kid can have a hobby. But if you skateboarded every day and practiced like a mad man and won some kind of skateboarding championship and then got a trophy, it would mean something. It would be the outward manifestation of your commitment to do something great.
It's sad that men today seek to tear down the accomplishments of others in order to rationalize their own mediocrity.
Brucifer
· 9 months ago
All good recommendations. I was especially gratified with the emphasis toward club sports. That said, “sports” these days have become associated with games of chasing silly balls of various sorts while wearing one’s underwear. And although there is the self-styled posturing that such sports build character, teamwork and leadership, they mostly do not. These days especially, “sports” players degrade, not uplift society.
Thus, why not attune one’s physical exertions and pursuits toward activities that might prove actually useful to oneself and to others? By this, I mean martial arts, shooting sports, fencing club and the like. If more chaps would eschew playing at shooting and swordsmanship on some foolish computer game and try it on for real, we’d have a crop of better men upcoming.
And yes, rock climbing, camping, cross-country hiking and skiing. Let us not though forget that the vaunted Samurai warriors were also expected to learn poetry, flower arrangement, tea ceremony and meditation. (You would not disrespect a Samurai with pejoratives of “metrosexual” and not expect your ass getting handed to you in reply.) Viking warriors also prized poetry.
Alas, too much of the current college experience involves majoring in binge drinking, womanizing and grab-assing.
Fred Cai
· 9 months ago
@ Brucifer Whats the problem with team sports? There is much to be said about those games where one is 'chasing silly balls of various sorts while wearing one’s underwear.' As an avid soccer player, I can attest to the personal growth I had while playing varsity sports in high school. My team made me push myself further than I could go on my own, and I miss having that support when it comes to physical training.
I still play intramurals in college now, but the comradery is nowhere near the point I had playing for months at a time with the same group of guys. Now, I'll admit, its just a game, just some kicks for entertainment, but with my team, it was one of the most important aspects of my life.
You can't forget that that 'silly ball' is merely a focal point in a war of mental and physical will, no matter what the sport. Your team mates are your brothers, and they rely on you as much as you rely on them. That's the lesson I learned well during my time in team sports, and I'm sorry if you did not get the same effect, because you are missing out on a great experience.
Fred Cai
· 9 months ago
I completely forgot to mention that this is a great article, and though I've only been in college for a couple years, I've had some amazing experiences by following that way over used bit of advice, 'Carpe Diem.' (Anyone else automatically think, 'Oh Captain, my Captain,' when they hear that?).
I'd like to thrown in intellectual competition as a way of getting out there too. I've been a part of a couple international engineering competitions (namely Design Build Fly and the University Rover Competition), and both were massive amounts of fun that have given me better understanding in the class room as well as gained me friendships with upperclassmen and graduate students, who have helped guide me in my studies since.
Allen Frans
· 9 months ago
Great thought in this article! i enjoyed college so much i squeezed 4 years into 7! of course, with the parents divorce at the end of high school, there went all financial and emtional support so i worked through and paid for it myself.
Book recommendations:
"The Barbarian Way" by Erwin McManus. what a fantastic read. challenges the heart of a man in many areas. well written. i have given away more copies of this book than any other.
"Season of Life: A Football Star, A Boy, A Journey to Manhood" by Jeffrey Marx absolutely fantastic. incredible stories and personal experience. the over arching question coming out of this book: Are you a man built for yourself or a man built for others?" just awesome. every man should read this book.
Randy
· 9 months ago
I am currently a senior in undergrad, and am entering medical school this summer. I agree with most of what you have said, but I was a little disappointed that the only service mentioned within your Service/Leadership area was through campus organizations.
I have been involved in several campus organizations (honors program, clubs, societies), but service is the area that has crafted me into the man that I am today. I complete all of my service off-campus primarily as a way to show the community that college students care about issues beyond their front porch. However, I have also found that when my friends ask about my service work, they often take up an interest in it and find their own service sites. It's a beautiful way to share what one has been blessed with, both physically and socially.
Tom
· 9 months ago
One great book that I read while an undergrad that changed the way I looked at a lot of things (including college) was Viktor Frankl's Man's Search for Meaning. I read it in about 3-4 hours, and I've reread it a dozen times.
IA_
· 9 months ago
Just getting out of college, if I had another go I too would take better advantage of my opportunities.
You're forgetting one important aspect: Spiritual.
Go to church! Jesus helped me grow as man more than anyone else. Religion is the pursuit of truth. College is a apt time to go beyond simply believing to figuring out why you believe what you believe. Read the letters of St. Ignatius of Antioch (martyred between 98-117 AD) who was eager to be martyred for Christ. There is a vast difference in thinking I shouldn't have premarital sex and understanding sex as a part of marriage, part of a life-long union catching man up into God's creative genesis.
It helps you develop responsibility through aiding out others more in need than you, volunteering at the local soup kitchen perhaps.
College is a good time to also develop lasting male friendships. It is beneficial to know somebody will always have your back and you need to be there for someone else. And life is fun together.
Lenton
· 9 months ago
I'm studying engineering at university right now and whole-heartedly agree with this post (both directly above and the main article.) An excellent book for the Young Christian Male is:
Purity: The New Moral Revolution by Kris Vallotton
It takes a look at why avoiding pre-marital sex is important, along with some other related topics, like marriage.
Brian
· 9 months ago
Very good article. I was one of those that went from being a shy guy in high school to a leader on campus, and college can really be a life-changing time if you allow it to be. I now teach at a university, and I try to encourage my students to seize their college experience and make the most of it. I see far too many men in their 20s and even in their 30s that still haven't "grown up" and become men.
In regards, to the other posts, college is the best time to expand your horizons - take those literature and philosophy, study abroad, find avenues to learn leadership skills through student clubs, intramural sports, and service. Mentoring to younger boys, such as working with the Boys and Girls Club, is an excellent way to help boys learn how to be men. ALways strive for excellence, self-improvement, and self-realization.
And Fred, I always think ‘Oh Captain, my Captain,’ when I hear carpe diem - great film!
Matt
· 9 months ago
As far as book recommendations go, Peter Taylor was one of our greatest short-story writers, I'd go so far as to consider him the American Chekhov. Sadly, he's not read that often anymore. He writes about high-class Southerns, especially men, as their world--of the Depression through the '50s--changes drastically, and how they handle it with grace and class (he does, however, freely criticize them for their often racist and misogynistic attitudes). His Collected Stories are out of print, but most any decent library would have it. Check it out and read "Dean of Men," which I think is one of the greatest "to a young man moving into the real world" stories I've ever read.
j s
· 9 months ago
"Wild at Heart".
All I have to say. It's from a Christian perspective and it is filled with great insight for all men today, and particularly for those who are coming of age.
All Comments
Thanks,
Nate
if you're still in college, i'll tell you right now: it's not fun to say that. don't make the same mistake.
I was lucky and got a second chance, but not at such a good uni, nor on a course I loved. But having travelled America, grown up a bit, and yes even read a biography of Theodore Roosevelt (funny how young men seeking to self improve are drawn to him, I was pleased to see how much emphasis is placed on his example on this website!) I have fully engaged with my new course, joined sports teams, run societies and really focussed on the future, and it has made all the difference. I just wish I had done that the first time around!
I am now weeks aways from graduating, and am hoping to be ordained into the Church of England, which will mean yet another three years of study! By the time I leave higher education I should have it down to fine art!
To mention, actually being involved in the arts can give the mind and spirit the same workout as that of an athlete (not as physical, but you get the point.) Once you leave the campus life for the real life, all of those things become pricey but also not always as accessible. Only libraries in major urban areas can rival those of a campus, and ticket prices for performances are quite pricey in the real world.
So in conclusion, don't forget the Arts & Literature are also a fine (and recommended) way to keep a balanced, positive focus while in higher education!
I graduated from University of Col BOulder about 2 years ago...great school
All these student are deserving young men who ALL get a full scholarship (tuition, room and board) to go here.
www.williamson.edu
He also happened to be my grandfather.
You can google "Kayo Lam" for more info.
Trophies, papers, and ceremonies are hardly artificial. They are tangible manifestations of the kind of things you personally wish to see celebrated-risk, personal relationships, overcoming obstacles, making ethical decisions, ect. One does not get to be student body president if he hasn't cultivated warm relationships with others. You don't get to be a Rhodes scholar if you haven't overcome obstacles and disciplined yourself. You don't become a Supreme Court justice by avoiding ethical decisions. A list like the one above is simply shorthand for a lifetime of worthy decisions. These are real achievements, not because of the certificate at the end, but because of all the work it took to get there.
Why would you get a trophy for just skateboarding? Skateboarding itself says very little about your character. Any kid can have a hobby. But if you skateboarded every day and practiced like a mad man and won some kind of skateboarding championship and then got a trophy, it would mean something. It would be the outward manifestation of your commitment to do something great.
It's sad that men today seek to tear down the accomplishments of others in order to rationalize their own mediocrity.
Thus, why not attune one’s physical exertions and pursuits toward activities that might prove actually useful to oneself and to others? By this, I mean martial arts, shooting sports, fencing club and the like. If more chaps would eschew playing at shooting and swordsmanship on some foolish computer game and try it on for real, we’d have a crop of better men upcoming.
And yes, rock climbing, camping, cross-country hiking and skiing. Let us not though forget that the vaunted Samurai warriors were also expected to learn poetry, flower arrangement, tea ceremony and meditation. (You would not disrespect a Samurai with pejoratives of “metrosexual” and not expect your ass getting handed to you in reply.) Viking warriors also prized poetry.
Alas, too much of the current college experience involves majoring in binge drinking, womanizing and grab-assing.
Whats the problem with team sports? There is much to be said about those games where one is 'chasing silly balls of various sorts while wearing one’s underwear.' As an avid soccer player, I can attest to the personal growth I had while playing varsity sports in high school. My team made me push myself further than I could go on my own, and I miss having that support when it comes to physical training.
I still play intramurals in college now, but the comradery is nowhere near the point I had playing for months at a time with the same group of guys. Now, I'll admit, its just a game, just some kicks for entertainment, but with my team, it was one of the most important aspects of my life.
You can't forget that that 'silly ball' is merely a focal point in a war of mental and physical will, no matter what the sport. Your team mates are your brothers, and they rely on you as much as you rely on them. That's the lesson I learned well during my time in team sports, and I'm sorry if you did not get the same effect, because you are missing out on a great experience.
I'd like to thrown in intellectual competition as a way of getting out there too. I've been a part of a couple international engineering competitions (namely Design Build Fly and the University Rover Competition), and both were massive amounts of fun that have given me better understanding in the class room as well as gained me friendships with upperclassmen and graduate students, who have helped guide me in my studies since.
Book recommendations:
"The Barbarian Way" by Erwin McManus. what a fantastic read. challenges the heart of a man in many areas. well written. i have given away more copies of this book than any other.
"Season of Life: A Football Star, A Boy, A Journey to Manhood" by Jeffrey Marx
absolutely fantastic. incredible stories and personal experience. the over arching question coming out of this book: Are you a man built for yourself or a man built for others?" just awesome. every man should read this book.
I have been involved in several campus organizations (honors program, clubs, societies), but service is the area that has crafted me into the man that I am today. I complete all of my service off-campus primarily as a way to show the community that college students care about issues beyond their front porch. However, I have also found that when my friends ask about my service work, they often take up an interest in it and find their own service sites. It's a beautiful way to share what one has been blessed with, both physically and socially.
You're forgetting one important aspect: Spiritual.
Go to church! Jesus helped me grow as man more than anyone else. Religion is the pursuit of truth. College is a apt time to go beyond simply believing to figuring out why you believe what you believe. Read the letters of St. Ignatius of Antioch (martyred between 98-117 AD) who was eager to be martyred for Christ. There is a vast difference in thinking I shouldn't have premarital sex and understanding sex as a part of marriage, part of a life-long union catching man up into God's creative genesis.
It helps you develop responsibility through aiding out others more in need than you, volunteering at the local soup kitchen perhaps.
College is a good time to also develop lasting male friendships. It is beneficial to know somebody will always have your back and you need to be there for someone else. And life is fun together.
Purity: The New Moral Revolution by Kris Vallotton
It takes a look at why avoiding pre-marital sex is important, along with some other related topics, like marriage.
In regards, to the other posts, college is the best time to expand your horizons - take those literature and philosophy, study abroad, find avenues to learn leadership skills through student clubs, intramural sports, and service. Mentoring to younger boys, such as working with the Boys and Girls Club, is an excellent way to help boys learn how to be men. ALways strive for excellence, self-improvement, and self-realization.
And Fred, I always think ‘Oh Captain, my Captain,’ when I hear carpe diem - great film!
All I have to say. It's from a Christian perspective and it is filled with great insight for all men today, and particularly for those who are coming of age.