Art of Manliness: Teaching Your Son to be a Man | The Art of Manliness
Justin Luddington
· 1 year ago
Hear, hear! Well written.
Bob Iger
· 1 year ago
Very true. Great article!
Weber
· 1 year ago
beautiful
Joe
· 1 year ago
Great article - very well written and well said.
Thomas Black
· 1 year ago
Amen. And Preach it! Are the exhortations which come to mind. I've grown incredibly weary of the weak minded, ignorant, slob image that passes for manhood in this day and age. Yes a man should be tough, but tough inwardly first - with moral fiber coming before muscle fiber.
Oh, and one point I would love for you to address. I repeatedly tell my son: Under no circumstances whatsoever is a man EVER to hit a woman. Never.
Derek
· 1 year ago
Great post.
When I look at pictures from yesteryear and pictures of men today, there is really no comparison. It's not just the affect of nostalgia.....the manliness of guys back then just exudes from the frame. Same with old movies...sure they're acting, but their poise, sense of dignity and control...simply the way they carry themselves as men is quite different.
Ricky B
· 1 year ago
D@mn.
That was powerful, man. Thank you for this site and all the revelations it has given me. As someone who grew up without a father around, it's good to have a resource that's truly conveys the essence of TRUE manliness and not the shallow expectations and interpretations that are out there today.
thanks again.
NZR
· 1 year ago
This was one of the best things I have read in a while. While I haven't any children, this is still something that I can take and use in my own life preparation for fatherhood.
Thank you.
Janice Cartier
· 1 year ago
" ...to man up and mean it"
This would be my wish for today. Every woman would thank you.
(Wonderful Sean. Love the photo. Made me think of my dad and grandfather. They wore tie clips. Anyone ever put those on anymore? )
Tom
· 1 year ago
I like your point about how during the feminist movement, there was a misunderstanding. You're absolutely right about the fact that we've gotten collective amnesia, and have forgotten exactly WHY manners are important, and what the real worth of a man is.
Excellent post. I wish every father would read and follow.
~~~
· 1 year ago
You're like the father I never had.
Adam Snider
· 1 year ago
Ain't it the truth?
This is exactly what I needed to read today. I've been thinking a lot about how the true meaning of manliness got lost somewhere along the way from the past to the present. Somehow, it got twisted, and so many of us never grow past boyhood. For whatever reason, these boys never become real men, and so use violence and disrespect to make themselves feel like men. That's not real manliness.
Real manliness are the qualities that Sean is teaching his son. Real manliness is the kind of manliness espoused by The Art of Manliness. I just wish more people would heed this advice.
Hayden Tompkins
· 1 year ago
This article is just phenomenal. I lovelovelove what it said about opening a door for a woman.
Eric
· 1 year ago
Great post. It reminds me of one of my favorite quotes. It's from a silly movie, really, but one that contains a lot of great wisdom. Joe vs. the Volcano, with Tom Hanks and Meg Ryan. The chief of the Waponi tribe (which needs Joe to sacrifice himself to the volcano) says "we are the children of children, and we live as we are shown". That quote has always resonated with me.
Wow. Powerful article, sir, powerful indeed. This is the kind of wisdom all fathers need, the kind that could make the world a better place. This site should really get on some national programs like a syndicated radio show or the Today show or something, get the word out to the fathers and boys of today.
IamTyler
· 1 year ago
Very well written article. This should be posted in newspapers around the country. I myself am tired of feeling ashamed of my generation. So many of the lessons I learned are lost. I see so much selfish and self-destructive behavior. Im no lumping us all into one group, but i feel it has become more prominent now than ever in our "i want everything now" society.
At 30, i'm still learning what it is to be a good man, but there are things that i have always done. I have always said "please" and "thank you". I have always held and opened doors for strangers, both men and women. My rule on that one is, if you see the person coming, wait and hold the door for them. I have always done my best to put others infront of me.One example is, at the grocery store, if I have a cart full of items and the person behind me has a basket, I let them go infront of me. I could go on, but what I'm really getting at is simple. As a good man, I feel that it is my responsibility to leave things better than I found them. Make a positive impact on a persons day, weather you know them or not. Say good morning to a stranger, if someone looks like they need a hand, simply offer. All minor things that can make a huge difference.
Quite simply, be the person that people can count on, weather they know it or not. The next time you see a person who looks like maybe they could use some help, think of your grandfather and grandmother, your father and mother, your brother or sister, your son or daughter and act accordingly. Do for people what you would do if anyone of those people were standing next to you (especially your mother) and you won't go wrong. Be a proud man and lead by example.
Spc. Lauer
· 1 year ago
I damn near choked up reading this. God bless you, fine sir, for an insight on becoming a father. I read this hearing my dad's voice teaching me the important lessons that taught me to become the soldier and the man I am today.
May every man read this, and express to his son the Art of Manliness.
Barbara Swafford - Blogging Wi
· 1 year ago
What a beautiful post. I love hearing dads talk about the relationship with their sons. Obviously your son will grow up to be just as sensitive to life issues as you are. What a fabulous role model you are. Your boy is lucky, and loved.
Tara@Sticky Fingers
· 1 year ago
I couldn't agree more with you Writer Dad. I too have a son (6) who I hope and pray will grow up to be a 'man'. We teach him that manners are priority (a child with good manners goes a long long way, I have found), treat people as you wish to be treated and above all else live your life so that when you look back on it you will feel proud.
A lot of this comes down to dads. My boy watches his dad like a hawk, copies everything he does and you can see him teetering on the edge of wanting to be just like him. It breaks my heart to witness how few fathers recognise that any more.
Ian
· 1 year ago
"For example, my son will know how to admit when he is wrong, because a real man does not always carry the need to be right. Being a man means recognizing when we err, and then extracting our best lesson from the experience."
That is a great point. The need to be right is in the realm of those with low self-esteem and lack of respect. Being a man is not always fun, nor glorious, but it pays its dividends in a different manner. Being a man gives back when others look to us for support and for the wisdom that we acquire by doing well, being well, and giving well.
As always, Sean, you are a master wordsmith with the weight of truth behind your articles. Thanks for writing this.
Matthew Dryden
· 1 year ago
Oh. Hell. Yes.
Betsy
· 1 year ago
Sean, this is your all time best because it has all you are and strive to be. Bravo. Hall of Fame. Hats off to you!
Kelly
· 1 year ago
Sean,
I'm with Betsy. You often get me "right here" but this is just on another plane. Is a sole tear carefully hidden allowed at one of my favorite places to lurk?
Thanks, AoM, for having Sean in to write this dead-on portrait of things I miss and things that shouldn't be missing at all.
Regards,
Kelly
Túlio de Almeida
· 1 year ago
Very good. Right in every country.
Nigel
· 1 year ago
What a superb article. It brought back such memories of my Dad. I have a favorite photograph of him taken on a day out in the early '60s, well before I was born in '66. He is standing with his '56 Cresta (I'm writing from England, so think '53/4 Chevy to get the mental picture) and as Sean said, exuding from the photograph you can practically see the manners, manliness and strength of the man. He is wearing a grey suit, white shirt and a dark tie and all my life I have striven to be as much of a man. As a consequence of having such a good example to follow, I pride myself on my apperance, and try to uphold all of these lost standards mentioned in the article and most of the comments. As I look at what passes for men these days slobbing around with their pants half way down and a little boy's hat on backwards or sideways, cursing swearing and spitting, it occurs to me that they're probably not behaving like that just to annoy me, but in fact they don't actually know how to behave in public, and don't have any standards to aspire to. This article should be compulsary for new parents.
melina
· 1 year ago
Hello there. I'm happy to see that there's actually a website for males on the art of manliness - or being a REAL MAN! I commend you. My site is about the art of femininity!
Quote; 'For example, my son will know how to admit when he is wrong, because a real man does not always carry the need to be right. Being a man means recognizing when we err, and then extracting our best lesson from the experience....'
Wow, I think I must be reading the words of a real man here, a man who's sense of worth is so secure that admitting he has made a mistake will not crush him!
I am sure with you as a role model, your son is definitely going to grow up into a real man as well!
Melina :-)
Kyle
· 11 months ago
Absolutely one of the best articles I have ever read! Thank you for teaching me these valuable life lessons.
sean808080
· 9 months ago
Great post on a great blog. Thanks for voicing what some have realized through trial and error.
All Comments
Oh, and one point I would love for you to address. I repeatedly tell my son: Under no circumstances whatsoever is a man EVER to hit a woman. Never.
When I look at pictures from yesteryear and pictures of men today, there is really no comparison. It's not just the affect of nostalgia.....the manliness of guys back then just exudes from the frame. Same with old movies...sure they're acting, but their poise, sense of dignity and control...simply the way they carry themselves as men is quite different.
That was powerful, man. Thank you for this site and all the revelations it has given me. As someone who grew up without a father around, it's good to have a resource that's truly conveys the essence of TRUE manliness and not the shallow expectations and interpretations that are out there today.
thanks again.
Thank you.
This would be my wish for today. Every woman would thank you.
(Wonderful Sean. Love the photo. Made me think of my dad and grandfather. They wore tie clips. Anyone ever put those on anymore? )
Excellent post. I wish every father would read and follow.
This is exactly what I needed to read today. I've been thinking a lot about how the true meaning of manliness got lost somewhere along the way from the past to the present. Somehow, it got twisted, and so many of us never grow past boyhood. For whatever reason, these boys never become real men, and so use violence and disrespect to make themselves feel like men. That's not real manliness.
Real manliness are the qualities that Sean is teaching his son. Real manliness is the kind of manliness espoused by The Art of Manliness. I just wish more people would heed this advice.
http://www.swarthmore.edu/~apreset1/docs/if.html
At 30, i'm still learning what it is to be a good man, but there are things that i have always done. I have always said "please" and "thank you". I have always held and opened doors for strangers, both men and women. My rule on that one is, if you see the person coming, wait and hold the door for them. I have always done my best to put others infront of me.One example is, at the grocery store, if I have a cart full of items and the person behind me has a basket, I let them go infront of me. I could go on, but what I'm really getting at is simple. As a good man, I feel that it is my responsibility to leave things better than I found them. Make a positive impact on a persons day, weather you know them or not. Say good morning to a stranger, if someone looks like they need a hand, simply offer. All minor things that can make a huge difference.
Quite simply, be the person that people can count on, weather they know it or not. The next time you see a person who looks like maybe they could use some help, think of your grandfather and grandmother, your father and mother, your brother or sister, your son or daughter and act accordingly. Do for people what you would do if anyone of those people were standing next to you (especially your mother) and you won't go wrong. Be a proud man and lead by example.
May every man read this, and express to his son the Art of Manliness.
I too have a son (6) who I hope and pray will grow up to be a 'man'. We teach him that manners are priority (a child with good manners goes a long long way, I have found), treat people as you wish to be treated and above all else live your life so that when you look back on it you will feel proud.
A lot of this comes down to dads. My boy watches his dad like a hawk, copies everything he does and you can see him teetering on the edge of wanting to be just like him.
It breaks my heart to witness how few fathers recognise that any more.
That is a great point. The need to be right is in the realm of those with low self-esteem and lack of respect. Being a man is not always fun, nor glorious, but it pays its dividends in a different manner. Being a man gives back when others look to us for support and for the wisdom that we acquire by doing well, being well, and giving well.
As always, Sean, you are a master wordsmith with the weight of truth behind your articles. Thanks for writing this.
I'm with Betsy. You often get me "right here" but this is just on another plane. Is a sole tear carefully hidden allowed at one of my favorite places to lurk?
Thanks, AoM, for having Sean in to write this dead-on portrait of things I miss and things that shouldn't be missing at all.
Regards,
Kelly
Quote; 'For example, my son will know how to admit when he is wrong, because a real man does not always carry the need to be right. Being a man means recognizing when we err, and then extracting our best lesson from the experience....'
Wow, I think I must be reading the words of a real man here, a man who's sense of worth is so secure that admitting he has made a mistake will not crush him!
I am sure with you as a role model, your son is definitely going to grow up into a real man as well!
Melina :-)