Art of Manliness - Latest Comments in Teaching Your Son to be a Man | The Art of Manliness

Re: Teaching Your Son to be a Man | The Art of Manliness

Kenny A. — Thu, 05 Dec 2013 16:04:02 -0000

Reading through the archives makes me wish I had found this site years before I stumbled upon while researching advice on what it meant to be a Godfather.
Having no children myself, I find plenty of useful lessons to pass on to my nephews and my Godson when he is older.
Thanks!

Re: Teaching Your Son to be a Man | The Art of Manliness

Greg — Thu, 25 Apr 2013 10:53:42 -0000

That's great. I have just found this site when attempting to understand more fully how I can better teach my son to be a 'good man'. I have asked him to make a list (as I have too) to open a discussion around the topic of what makes 'a good man. Respecting women was the 1st thing I wrote alongside, 'respect yourself'. My son is 22 and I am concerned that I have not offered him much education in this area. My dads dad dies when he was very young and I feel that I was not offered much guidance in this area. Good manners and punctuality were the primary ones my dad taught me. I want to go much deeper than this so coming across Art of Manliness has been great. Thanks Brett and Kate and everyone who has also commented.

Re: Teaching Your Son to be a Man | The Art of Manliness

Ann — Thu, 08 Jul 2010 01:37:01 -0000

What beautiful wisdom to share - thank you thank you, Sean for writing this. My ex-husband and father to our two children has been MIA due to chronic mental illness and alcoholism. Your words sum up the lessons I as a single mom have tried to teach my son throughout the last 17 years. He will soon go off to college - your book will travel with him as a small surprise in his suitcase. Peace.

Re: Teaching Your Son to be a Man | The Art of Manliness

andrea — Tue, 29 Jun 2010 00:04:54 -0000

Amen.... love it!
All men should be taught this...

A man, above all, recognizes his duty and therefore does not accept it lightly. He understands that his word is his bond, exercised by everyday actions and daily decisions. He will not waft through life selfish or disconnected, like someone who carries a fickle mind. A man, a real man, will not make promises he cannot keep, and chooses his words as carefully as he does his commitments. And because this man honors his words, he is in turned honored in his actions.
And while years may fall carelessly from the calendar, and the world may pass us by like a reckless wind, it is never too late to man up and mean it

Re: Teaching Your Son to be a Man | The Art of Manliness

Sonia — Tue, 04 May 2010 16:57:11 -0000

Why are these qualities particular to men? You seem to have assembled a wonderful list of characteristics like honesty, respect, and poise that we all, as human beings, should be able to expect from each other.

On a side note, I am a woman, and I've always had the impulse to open doors for people. I'm uncomfortable when men open doors for me just because I'm a woman, as I'd be just as likely to open a door for a man. So yes, open doors for people. It's polite. But know that every individual will have a different reaction that may or may not be "congruent" with what's expected for their gender.

Re: Teaching Your Son to be a Man | The Art of Manliness

Ryan — Thu, 31 Dec 2009 10:10:17 -0000

Ouch. That one hurt. Bravo.

Re: Teaching Your Son to be a Man | The Art of Manliness

Alejandro — Wed, 22 Apr 2009 21:10:25 -0000

Great editorial, Sean, and very true! I'm thankful I had a great father in my life. I don't care what those self-righteous feminist jerks and so-called enlightened men say, men are vital to the welfare of children as are women. Humanity has survived in tact because fathers took active roles in the lives of their offspring; not - as Barbara Tuchman once claimed - in spite of it. Every boy should have a father, or at least a father figure, like my own dad and, of course, Sean!

Re: Teaching Your Son to be a Man | The Art of Manliness

sean808080 — Tue, 24 Mar 2009 06:58:35 -0000

Great post on a great blog. Thanks for voicing what some have realized through trial and error.

Re: Teaching Your Son to be a Man | The Art of Manliness

Kyle — Tue, 20 Jan 2009 23:49:33 -0000

Absolutely one of the best articles I have ever read! Thank you for teaching me these valuable life lessons.

Re: Teaching Your Son to be a Man | The Art of Manliness

melina — Sun, 14 Dec 2008 20:42:27 -0000

Hello there. I'm happy to see that there's actually a website for males on the art of manliness - or being a REAL MAN! I commend you. My site is about the art of femininity!

Quote; 'For example, my son will know how to admit when he is wrong, because a real man does not always carry the need to be right. Being a man means recognizing when we err, and then extracting our best lesson from the experience....'

Wow, I think I must be reading the words of a real man here, a man who's sense of worth is so secure that admitting he has made a mistake will not crush him!

I am sure with you as a role model, your son is definitely going to grow up into a real man as well!

Melina :-)

Re: Teaching Your Son to be a Man | The Art of Manliness

Nigel — Fri, 12 Dec 2008 13:50:33 -0000

What a superb article. It brought back such memories of my Dad. I have a favorite photograph of him taken on a day out in the early '60s, well before I was born in '66. He is standing with his '56 Cresta (I'm writing from England, so think '53/4 Chevy to get the mental picture) and as Sean said, exuding from the photograph you can practically see the manners, manliness and strength of the man. He is wearing a grey suit, white shirt and a dark tie and all my life I have striven to be as much of a man. As a consequence of having such a good example to follow, I pride myself on my apperance, and try to uphold all of these lost standards mentioned in the article and most of the comments. As I look at what passes for men these days slobbing around with their pants half way down and a little boy's hat on backwards or sideways, cursing swearing and spitting, it occurs to me that they're probably not behaving like that just to annoy me, but in fact they don't actually know how to behave in public, and don't have any standards to aspire to. This article should be compulsary for new parents.

Re: Teaching Your Son to be a Man | The Art of Manliness

Túlio de Almeida — Fri, 12 Dec 2008 12:16:10 -0000

Very good. Right in every country.

Re: Teaching Your Son to be a Man | The Art of Manliness

Kelly — Sun, 07 Dec 2008 08:06:26 -0000

Sean,

I'm with Betsy. You often get me "right here" but this is just on another plane. Is a sole tear carefully hidden allowed at one of my favorite places to lurk?

Thanks, AoM, for having Sean in to write this dead-on portrait of things I miss and things that shouldn't be missing at all.

Regards,

Kelly

Re: Teaching Your Son to be a Man | The Art of Manliness

Betsy — Thu, 04 Dec 2008 21:12:37 -0000

Sean, this is your all time best because it has all you are and strive to be. Bravo. Hall of Fame. Hats off to you!

Re: Teaching Your Son to be a Man | The Art of Manliness

Matthew Dryden — Thu, 04 Dec 2008 17:08:01 -0000

Oh. Hell. Yes.

Re: Teaching Your Son to be a Man | The Art of Manliness

Ian — Thu, 04 Dec 2008 14:03:37 -0000

"For example, my son will know how to admit when he is wrong, because a real man does not always carry the need to be right. Being a man means recognizing when we err, and then extracting our best lesson from the experience."

That is a great point. The need to be right is in the realm of those with low self-esteem and lack of respect. Being a man is not always fun, nor glorious, but it pays its dividends in a different manner. Being a man gives back when others look to us for support and for the wisdom that we acquire by doing well, being well, and giving well.

As always, Sean, you are a master wordsmith with the weight of truth behind your articles. Thanks for writing this.

Re: Teaching Your Son to be a Man | The Art of Manliness

Tara@Sticky Fingers — Thu, 04 Dec 2008 05:20:44 -0000

I couldn't agree more with you Writer Dad.
I too have a son (6) who I hope and pray will grow up to be a 'man'. We teach him that manners are priority (a child with good manners goes a long long way, I have found), treat people as you wish to be treated and above all else live your life so that when you look back on it you will feel proud.

A lot of this comes down to dads. My boy watches his dad like a hawk, copies everything he does and you can see him teetering on the edge of wanting to be just like him.
It breaks my heart to witness how few fathers recognise that any more.

Re: Teaching Your Son to be a Man | The Art of Manliness

Barbara Swafford - Blogging Wi — Thu, 04 Dec 2008 03:08:43 -0000

What a beautiful post. I love hearing dads talk about the relationship with their sons. Obviously your son will grow up to be just as sensitive to life issues as you are. What a fabulous role model you are. Your boy is lucky, and loved.

Re: Teaching Your Son to be a Man | The Art of Manliness

Spc. Lauer — Wed, 03 Dec 2008 23:02:23 -0000

I damn near choked up reading this. God bless you, fine sir, for an insight on becoming a father. I read this hearing my dad's voice teaching me the important lessons that taught me to become the soldier and the man I am today.

May every man read this, and express to his son the Art of Manliness.

Re: Teaching Your Son to be a Man | The Art of Manliness

IamTyler — Wed, 03 Dec 2008 18:55:36 -0000

Very well written article. This should be posted in newspapers around the country. I myself am tired of feeling ashamed of my generation. So many of the lessons I learned are lost. I see so much selfish and self-destructive behavior. Im no lumping us all into one group, but i feel it has become more prominent now than ever in our "i want everything now" society.

At 30, i'm still learning what it is to be a good man, but there are things that i have always done. I have always said "please" and "thank you". I have always held and opened doors for strangers, both men and women. My rule on that one is, if you see the person coming, wait and hold the door for them. I have always done my best to put others infront of me.One example is, at the grocery store, if I have a cart full of items and the person behind me has a basket, I let them go infront of me. I could go on, but what I'm really getting at is simple. As a good man, I feel that it is my responsibility to leave things better than I found them. Make a positive impact on a persons day, weather you know them or not. Say good morning to a stranger, if someone looks like they need a hand, simply offer. All minor things that can make a huge difference.

Quite simply, be the person that people can count on, weather they know it or not. The next time you see a person who looks like maybe they could use some help, think of your grandfather and grandmother, your father and mother, your brother or sister, your son or daughter and act accordingly. Do for people what you would do if anyone of those people were standing next to you (especially your mother) and you won't go wrong. Be a proud man and lead by example.

Re: Teaching Your Son to be a Man | The Art of Manliness

Oracle989 — Wed, 03 Dec 2008 18:09:00 -0000

Wow. Powerful article, sir, powerful indeed. This is the kind of wisdom all fathers need, the kind that could make the world a better place. This site should really get on some national programs like a syndicated radio show or the Today show or something, get the word out to the fathers and boys of today.

Re: Teaching Your Son to be a Man | The Art of Manliness

Patrick — Wed, 03 Dec 2008 17:46:35 -0000

Fantastic article!

Re: Teaching Your Son to be a Man | The Art of Manliness

Scott Kellner — Wed, 03 Dec 2008 16:46:12 -0000

Thanks for posting. I'd add the old standby from Kipling. It's golden:
http://www.swarthmore.edu/~...

Re: Teaching Your Son to be a Man | The Art of Manliness

Eric — Wed, 03 Dec 2008 16:25:44 -0000

Great post. It reminds me of one of my favorite quotes. It's from a silly movie, really, but one that contains a lot of great wisdom. Joe vs. the Volcano, with Tom Hanks and Meg Ryan. The chief of the Waponi tribe (which needs Joe to sacrifice himself to the volcano) says "we are the children of children, and we live as we are shown". That quote has always resonated with me.

Re: Teaching Your Son to be a Man | The Art of Manliness

Hayden Tompkins — Wed, 03 Dec 2008 16:08:56 -0000

This article is just phenomenal. I lovelovelove what it said about opening a door for a woman.