Art of Manliness - Latest Comments in The Man’s Guide to the Perfect Marriage Proposal

Re: The Man’s Guide to the Perfect Marriage Proposal

Monica — Mon, 17 Feb 2014 02:28:45 -0000

I can only say that I wish my fiancee had looked into this website before he proposed to me because he proposed to me at a Sonic Drive In (Not a well thought out place) just a few days after my grandfather passed away (not the best timing either), and I can't help but feel it's a precursor as to what our life will be like together? I wish he had put more time and thought into a memorable marriage proposal like my friends and cousins fiancees did.

Re: The Man’s Guide to the Perfect Marriage Proposal

Craig — Mon, 20 Jan 2014 12:55:23 -0000

@Brett

You know, I still cannot understand why people read stuff which do not interest them. They read articles which they know they're not going to agree with and then bang - they comment something nasty.

A good article my friend. Best regards to you and your wife.
Craig

Re: The Man’s Guide to the Perfect Marriage Proposal

Persephone — Fri, 03 Jan 2014 02:12:17 -0000

My husband, poor man, had a romantic proposal planned. And a plan B. And a plan C. Too bad he didn't have a plan D! He picked out a beautiful ring, but had to get it sized. So the day it was due back in, He took me to my favorite restaurant. Too bad the ring wasn't back yet. Then he took me to a Chinese tea house for a picnic. It still wasn't back. Then he made me a wonderful candlelit dinner. Still not back! By the time he finally got it, he was out of ideas and proposed as I was falling asleep. Brave man, I told him that was the one way I DIDN'T want proposed, because my ex husband did that. This September will be 10 wonderful years, with a great lesson for my son: Propose FIRST! You can always size the ring later :)

Re: The Man’s Guide to the Perfect Marriage Proposal

Paul Capone — Wed, 18 Dec 2013 14:11:25 -0000

First, i disagree with the V-day proposal. Never give the ring on a holiday or birthday. The ring is yours to give as a symbol of love, not a gift to her. It is your heart feelings and emotions that she is displaying in the form of a ring. Give it higher meaning than a gift.

Second, a silent proposal is a no-go. It takes away from the man asking will you marry me. A suprise is nice, but as a woman, a true lady to spend the rest of her life with yours is a question every man needs to ask and not take for granted.

Finally, Paris is dirty. Venice, Italy is the most romantic place. My plan, if I had the time and money is to learn a few phrases in Italian (which I have), tell the man on the Gondola boat to let me know where the most beautiful place is on the tour, and take our picture. I will then tell him that I will be proposing to her at that time and to keep taking pictures or record it. A beautiful background, romantic boat ride in the most romantic city.

Re: The Man’s Guide to the Perfect Marriage Proposal

Daron — Mon, 16 Sep 2013 02:01:57 -0000

My fiance and I have been dating since last November, but we've known each other for about four years. We've talked about how much we love each other, and how great it would be to spend eternity together, but at the time there some roadblocks. She is LDS, and I wasn't.
We'd been to see the missionaries a few times in April and May, unfortunately right before she moved out of state with her family. Unbeknownst to her, I had had a plan, I wanted to get baptized (not just for her, that would absolutely be the wrong move, and a terrible motivation. I've kinda been drawing closer to the church for a couple years. Most of my friends are LDS, including her.), but I was trying to wait for two of my best friends to get back from their missions. It looked like there would be a very short window of time for us to be all in the same place at the same time, the second friend was coming home just in time for the first one to go off to college, but then a couple things changed, and he came home early. I then had to convince my girlfriend to come back, under the pretense of visiting Daniel (the second friend, it was only partially a pretense), but she was dragging her feet, because she wasn't sure he would want to see her (he'd had a bit of a thing for her before he left, so to come home to her dating me, he might not have been super happy. He was fine with it though, he'd already told me that he was happy for us). I told her that "of course he'll want to see you", but what was really going through my head was "I don't care!!!"
Anyways, she came back (I had to drive 6 hours to go get her, and 6 hours back), and I surprised her with the fact that I had been seeing the missionaries without telling her, and that my baptism was scheduled for the next day. She didn't believe me at first, then even after she did it took a while to sink in, but she was super happy for me. The next night, right after the baptism, I lingered behind with her, long enough for everyone to leave. I walked around the building, under the pretense of looking for an unlocked door to get back in for a drink of water (I actually kind of did have a bit of a scratchy throat), just to make sure we were alone. Then, when we'd come all the way back around to where we had started, I pulled the ring out of my pocket as I dropped to one knee. She was so surprised! Again!
By the way, the ring I proposed with was made out of wood, I carved it myself, out of the same hunk of wood I had used to carve an owl for her (inside joke; I say she is an owl). I am a big believer in making a proposal a delightful surprise, but also in working together to pick out a ring that she will love. That could be difficult to reconcile, though, so I came up with this idea. I used my wooden ring to propose (due to wood's nature of not being as durable as metal, she generally wears it on a necklace we bought afterwards), and we are shopping for a permanent ring to be used from henceforth. She really loved the gesture, and being able to say that I made her ring with my own two hands is great.

Re: The Man’s Guide to the Perfect Marriage Proposal

Jenny — Wed, 24 Apr 2013 11:22:47 -0000

I'm in a second relationship after the end of a long marriage. My first husband and I 'discussed' marriage and decided together...we were already living together and we knew how much pleasure a wedding would give our somewhat traditional families. We were together 22 years, so we did okay.

But, this time, I want a romantic proposal, not a discussion. I've been with this guy for almost two years and I want the surprise element and for him to go to some effort to make it special. Lately, I feel like he is testing the water in our conversations over the phone (we have a little distance between us) but I don't want to talk about it over the phone, and I don't want a 'discussion'. At the same time, I don't want to have to tell him that I want a more traditional proposal...kinda spoils it, having to ask. Sigh.

Re: The Man’s Guide to the Perfect Marriage Proposal

Lawrence G — Sat, 09 Mar 2013 17:11:19 -0000

I asked my girl to marry me last weekend after a year of courting and boy was it a load off my heart! I came to this here thread and read & reread the post & the comments so many times and I want to tell you all thank so much.
What I learnt from the whole experience? Put thought, careful thought into the whole event;trust me, she will appreciate the care you put in more than you expect

Re: The Man’s Guide to the Perfect Marriage Proposal

Mike Hignite — Fri, 04 Jan 2013 21:41:59 -0000

It is important to lie when you propose.

We had done our homework and both of us realized that we were moving toward marriage. I had already asked her dad. But to make it a surprise, I led her to believe that it would happen in a month at her parents house at Easter by asking somewhat pointed questions. Then I surprised her by proposing at the lovely Dow Gardens next to the Frank Lloyd Wright sprite statute.

The first words she said after "Yes!" were, "but you lied to me!"

That was 26 years ago. I've been lying when appropriate ever since.

Re: The Man’s Guide to the Perfect Marriage Proposal

Tina — Sat, 15 Dec 2012 01:39:36 -0000

I think that showing thought in your proposal is very important, and that the date doesn't matter as much as the way you do it. The most important thing though is to make sure to get her a ring that she'll be proud to wear. My proposal was sweet but all but ruined when it was upstaged by this large gaudy ring that my fiance' gave me. We got married, I got a new ring, and I still cringe when I think about our proposal.

Re: The Man’s Guide to the Perfect Marriage Proposal

Britany — Thu, 27 Sep 2012 14:31:19 -0000

My husband and I love the outdoors and are originally from Indiana but lived in Arkansas for a few years. While living there, his parents, sister, and her boyfriend came to visit for his birthday weekend. His sister and her boyfriend are outdoorsy as well so we decided to drive a few hours to Petit Jean State Park and spend the day hiking. While at the top of Petit Jean Mountain, overlooking the gorgeous Arkansas River and valley, his sister told us this story she had just read on a plaque about how the mountain and park got it's name. Apparently, there was a young couple in France that was torn apart when the gentleman was sent to explore The New World. She begged him to marry her before he left so she could go with him but he knew The New World wasn't safe for her so he refused. Not being able to bare thought of being without her love, she dressed up as a boy and snuck onto his ship as part of the crew going by the name Little John (Petit Jean in French). She lived and worked amongst them, and her love, for several months and they set up camp at the base of a mountain. She eventually became deathly ill and it was only after being checked by a doctor did they learn who she really was. She eventually died and they carried her all the way to the top of mountain so she could be buried with honor. After his sister finished telling the story I turned to my now husband and asked if he would've married me so I could go to The New World with him and he said of course he would. I rolled my eyes and jokingly said, "Oh right. You won't even marry me now." At that point he got down on one knee and pulled the ring out of his pocket. Luckily his sister was quick acting and got pictures of the whole thing. Apparently he had been carrying the ring around for weeks just waiting for the right moment. It wasn't planned, and even though I knew he had the ring, it was a complete surprise. It was absolutely perfect and even though it's kind of a long story to tell, I'll proud to tell it over and over again for the rest of my life!

Re: The Man’s Guide to the Perfect Marriage Proposal

Andrew — Tue, 13 Jul 2010 10:36:40 -0000

My fiancee is from Brazil, and we've known each other for over 3 years (we met in grad school). When we started dating, things clicked, and within a few months we discussion the logistics of us being from different countries and being married. Well, her visa for grad school ran out after she graduated, and had to go to Brazil. When I had to leave her in that airport, I knew for sure that I couldn't be without her.

So, we started compiling information to go forward with a fiancee visa petition, even though she was still in Brazil. That summer, I went to visit her for a few weeks, and I brought a copy of the binder that we sent into the US government as proof of our relationship for the visa. After about 2 weeks, I finally got to take her out to a nice restaurant (we didn't have the luxury of having our 1st meeting place proposal, since I had never been there--and the weather was very rainy for weeks on end). I brought the binder to the restaurant, because she hadn't actually seen it completed. In the binder was the story of our relationship--our emails, message, even phone bills that showed how much we talked since we've been dating... And also a picture of the ring, but I turned in backwards. And when we got to the page with the backward picture of the ring, I said, "Why is this picture backwards?"

I pulled it out, and showed it to her, and her eyes lit up. As she was admiring it, I stood up, pulled out the ring, and knelt down and said "It looks much better in person." Then, I told her how much I loved her and wanted to have the honor of spending the rest of my life with her. She loved it so much! It was somewhat cliche with the restaurant, but because of the weather, there were only a few people, and it was very intimate. Also, the binder was very personal as well because it represented not only our relationship's history, but also its future, as we are petitioning a visa to be able to get married. I love her so much!

Best of luck to all you out there!

Re: The Man’s Guide to the Perfect Marriage Proposal

YgorDon — Mon, 12 Jul 2010 04:02:44 -0000

This is how I proposed yesterday :) I was thinking a lot about how would I like to do a proposal, I also read all of this interesting tips.. But this is what I thougt was best for the two of us.

After waking up together in the morning I pulled out my guitar and played to her a few verses of a song that we both like, our romantic song. She liked that soooo much! Then I pulled out a big bouque of red roses, got my ring ready and knealed down in front of her, still sitting on a bed.., asked the question. At first she was quite confused, could not believed what was happening, I had really surprised her and she was still sleepy. But she said YES!

We then went to the balcony, brought the table and chairs there. It was early in the morning, and a beautiful summer day was in the making. There were only the two of us and birds singing. I then brought out the food (breakfast), that I had already prepared yesterday and poured ourselves a glass of strawberry champagne. We then had a short prayer, blessing this situation, food and ourselves, made a toast. We were both so happy and enyoyed the peacefull morning.

I think it was the right kind of proposal for us. It was simple, what we booth like, but still very romantic. I also wanted to do something so nice which she would never forget!

** And here is one more tip. Guys, learn to play the guitar or sometnihg.. really! It is so good to know something like that and then use it in such situations. Women just love it!

Re: The Man’s Guide to the Perfect Marriage Proposal

Chris — Thu, 08 Jul 2010 11:44:22 -0000

I'm only planning to propose twice in my life, and twice because my ex fiance left me because I joined the Military...
My First proposal was totally unexpected, We were visiting her Aunt and it began to get late, so I was going to take her home, she took the keys and I let her drive, while she was backing out of the driveway I had gotten alot of the Taco Bell Packets saying "Will You Marry Me" and gave her each one stating why I loved her and describing my version of each intimate moment we spent together from complete memory then while in the car, and not quite in my seat belt I got on one knee on my floorboard and asked her to marry me.. She had this teary glaze in her eyes and after a moment she just lurched forward and kissed me then said yes. that was the most difficult drive she has ever had she couldnt keep her eyes on the road afterward always wanting to gaze into my eyes... IT WAS AWESOME!!... I decided on the Taco Bell thing because, It was our thing, growing up, with us, our friends, and such...

Now the Second one I'm still debating on. With this one I already have 4 kids, 2 biological, I still want to make it awesome as hell and deffo memorable.. Next month we are taking a flight back to Texas for a couple of Days, and I think during that time would be the best time to do it. Now, I'm trying to either wait until we get there, OR do an inflight my version, my written material mock up of The Wedding Singer... Its not one of common methods, but I would like the opinion of everyone here...

Re: The Man’s Guide to the Perfect Marriage Proposal

Abby — Mon, 05 Jul 2010 03:20:20 -0000

Something I forgot to add. A good thing to remember is that a person cannot go backwards to who they once were, but they can always move forwards when it comes to the concept of changing, aka maturity. It get better, I promise! :)

Re: The Man’s Guide to the Perfect Marriage Proposal

Abby — Mon, 05 Jul 2010 02:33:23 -0000

@I wish:

Why did you settle then? I do have to agree that every woman should be made to feel special by her man at all times. Even by just a meanful look that he gives her. As women, whether admittedly or not, we fantasize from an early age about our wedding and our engagement (some go a bit overboard with it, and others just randomly dream of what it will be like). It is just in our nature to want a guy to take the time to think about us and how we would want to be proposed to. You don't have to be a hopeless romantic to want these things. Just know that it is never too late to have romance in your marraige, and worry not, because to be romantic does not necessarily mean to be materialistic. My adivce to you is to talk with him on a mature level about your feelings and desires. In a marraige you should both feel that you can freely discuss these things. If you are having trouble with opening up to one another, try marraige counseling, or suggesting this website to him in a kind manner. Some men are either misinformed or uninformed on their responsibilties and duties as a man and as a husband. I truly hope that things turn around for you, and that you and your husband are able to find joy together.

Re: The Man’s Guide to the Perfect Marriage Proposal

i wish — Wed, 16 Jun 2010 16:39:42 -0000

I feel the same as happycat. I always feel jipped by my husbands drunken proposal. No planning, no ring (to this day.. married and almost 2 years later.) He didn't ask my dad either, which he knew was important to me. I never thought I was the romantic type, but every girl likes to feel special.

I try and convince myself that those things don't matter, that he really loves me and materialism shouldn't take the place of love. But if you really love a woman, shouldn't you take the time and effort to make that moment special? Wasn't I worth it?

Sometimes I don't know why I said yes to any of it.

Re: The Man’s Guide to the Perfect Marriage Proposal

Ryan Bob — Mon, 14 Jun 2010 21:52:21 -0000

I helped out a fraternity brother with his proposal. I was a pledge at the time what he did was told her they were going out on a special date where she should dress up then some other brothers rode up in a limo fake kidnapped her i.e. blindfolded her and took her to the university church.

We had set up a slide show he made of pictures of them throughout their relationship. I was in charge of the spotlight which was to be on him while he played their song on the guitar. Then he ended by popping the question. She said yes and they rode off in the limo.

She seemed to like it.

Re: The Man’s Guide to the Perfect Marriage Proposal

benj — Wed, 05 May 2010 10:16:08 -0000

we're all good. she said yes

Re: The Man’s Guide to the Perfect Marriage Proposal

Deirdre — Sun, 02 May 2010 01:53:59 -0000

I love most of these ideas but could not agree more with Mabel about the overnight proposal: don't do it unless you're SURE she'll love it! As poor Happycat's story illustrates, a minimally-planned proposal can make your lady feel minimally cared-for. This is especially true if she is a planner by nature. Also, I like that your suggestions try to preserve the element of surprise a bit. It's illustrative of how a great relationship should be, in fact: if the only time you *ever* have a proposal-worthy evening is the evening on which you actually propose, you should probably be putting a wee bit more work into having those evenings, which will make her feel loved (so she will make you feel loved!).

Re: The Man’s Guide to the Perfect Marriage Proposal

Benj — Sun, 25 Apr 2010 21:59:31 -0000

I have asked her father, he said yes, got the ring, and I am ready... So this friday is the day i am doing it. We are both coming to the end of our bachelor degree's in Drama and Theatre teaching, and are putting on a performance, This friday, at our technical rehearsal I have pre-rigged spotlights and a projection of a star sky. Theatrical, given, but hopefully romantic and unique to something we share... Now lets hope she says yes!

Re: The Man’s Guide to the Perfect Marriage Proposal

the misfit — Thu, 22 Oct 2009 12:07:27 -0000

I always thought there was one and only one classic proposal (for everyone to whom it applies), and yet I saw it in none of the suggestions and none of the comments! So I'm commenting to add it. My husband proposed to me in a church - the one where I had received my First Communion and First Penance when I was six, and where each of us had attended separately before we even met, and where he knew I would want to be married (we were married there a few months later). Must be a good half my friends proposed in churches. I'm actually always surprised by the people who didn't. If you subscribe to the view that God will be an inseparable part of your marriage (which obviously we do), I don't understand how a proposal in a jewelry store or some skywriting thing will ever measure up. To each his own, of course, and I would never tell some other gal her proposal was sub-par. My husband didn't have any specially fancy way to ask, but I wouldn't have changed a single detail.

Re: The Man’s Guide to the Perfect Marriage Proposal

Evan — Sat, 19 Sep 2009 15:26:31 -0000

I met my husband at Barnes and Noble - he was working there. The first words he ever said to me, were "Can I help you?" Flash forward to years later, Christmas Eve, 2005, 9 am. I'd been dragged out of bed, hair frizzy, wearing a wonder-woman T-shirt and pink pajama pants, very grumpy at my husband. We were going to the grocery store right next to Barnes and Noble, with my mother, presumably to buy ingredients for Christmas Eve dinner. ("Why the hell does my mother need me to go grocery shopping?!") They waited until we were at the end of a very long line. My mother said, "Damn, I forgot to get something for your uncle. I'm gonna run in next door to Barnes and Noble." Dames said, "Oh, I forgot about him too...Honey, you've got the card, right?" Grumbling, I said I would wait on line and pay for the groceries. When I was walking towards the store, my Mom was walking back to me with a Barnes and Noble bag. "Here," she said, "let me help you get those into the car. Dames is still shopping." We walked back to Barnes and Noble, and as I entered, there was an announcement, "Damian, to customer service?" A little unusual, because he didn't work there any more, but I figured I must have heard the announcement wrong. I went bounding up to him, and gave him a big kiss. "This is where we met!" I said happily. "No," he said, "Follow me."

He walked me over to the exact bookshelf where we had met - only I thought it was the wrong one. "No, honey, it was over here!" I said, trying to drag him one shelf over. "No, I'm pretty sure," he said anxiously, still gripping my hand, "No! It's here, sweet - "

I had turned the corner, and there was my grandfather with a video camera.

"Oh!" I said, confused. ".....Hi?"

Damian sighed. "Come on out, everybody!" he said.

Seemingly all of my friends and family emerged from behind every bookshelf in the store. "Hi..." I said, still confused. My birthday and come and gone...what the -

"OH!!" I shrieked, and covered my face with my hands. Everybody started laughing. When I finally was able to take my hands away from my beet-red face, Damian was on one knee.

"The first thing I ever said to you, was 'can I help you,'" he said, "And I've been helping you ever since, and I want to keep helping you for the rest of our lives."

We got married in 10/7/07 - our second anniversary's coming up. ^_^

Re: The Man’s Guide to the Perfect Marriage Proposal

Jack — Wed, 10 Jun 2009 11:48:51 -0000

My wife of two years now and I met in Mexico while traveling for a non-profit organization; I was introducing her to all my contacts throughout the countryside. Well, we totally fell for each other, and we started dating.

The greatest proposal ever? After we had been dating for 6 months, I packed a bunch of travel bags, and picked her up Friday night of a long weekend. She loves to travel and surprises, so I would not tell her where we were going. I took her to our favorite restaurant (the one of our first date: a little dimly-lit, hole-in-the-wall Mexican restaurant) for her favorite dinner. After dinner, I drove her through back roads to an empty field where we sat out looking at the stars. Driving out of the field, I accidentally jammed the tire into a storm grate, getting us stuck out in the middle of nowhere with no cellphone coverage. Someone stopped by after about a half hour and pulled us free, and we started off again to the secret location. Well, we got pulled over about five minutes later for "crossing the double yellow line" while going around a turn. The cop let us go, and we spent the evening walking around a local town that sets up all these Christmas lights.

She LOVED that date, so for my proposal six months later, I had just returned from a job in Alaska where I had been for the last month. I packed a bunch of bags again, and had her pick out her favorite romantic music. We drove down that same infamous road to a different field, where I had setup a blanket and torches. We stood barefoot on the blanket dancing under the stars for hours. At the end of the evening, I pulled out one of the dummy bags (that was secretly full of roses) and recited a poem I had written for her about all the things I love about her (one line for each rose for each month of dating). When I pulled out the last rose (now one month over) I pulled The Ring off a ribbon tied to the stem and asked her to marry me.

(She still tells me that she was afraid that last rose was me telling her I was going to be gone for another month on a new job)

BEST PROPOSAL EVER!

Re: The Man’s Guide to the Perfect Marriage Proposal

BanjoCrazyKyle — Thu, 07 May 2009 16:19:59 -0000

I proposed to my wife after 6 months of dating. Having gotten her father's approval several months prior, I bought the ring she picked out right around Christmas. I hadn't planned for a stereotypical proposal, but it happened that way. I was staying at her parents' house for a weekend after I bought the ring, and her whole family knew (3 sisters and Mom and Dad.) They all kept quiet. Her and I went out to take the dogs for a walk at around 1:00 am, (crazy, right?) and started talking about very important matters, like when I wrecked my truck and almost died, etc., etc. Eventually, about 10 min. before we got home, one of the dogs had to "take care of business," so we were stopped. I knew it was now or never, so I pulled the ring out of my pocket, without kneeling for obvious reasons, and asked her to marry me. We had talked about getting married for some time prior to this, so she just laughed it off and said, "You know I'll marry you, we talk about it all the time." The I opened the box to show her the ring, and she leaned forward and squinted and I said, "No, I'm proposing to you. Will you marry me?" To this, she shrieked, said yes, and hugged and kissed me. When we got back to her parents' house, her sisters were in the hallway with their heads peeking around the corner stacked up one above the other like something out of a 3 Stooges episode, (no pun intended.) She didn't even have time to show them the ring and they started screaming. It was great. So, all in all, we had a really "crappy" proposal. The End.

Re: The Man’s Guide to the Perfect Marriage Proposal

Simon — Sun, 03 May 2009 16:01:51 -0000

You can also begin to prepare the divorce proposal. Odds are 50/50. You'll save time later.

Do. Not. MARRY. EVER.